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05

May

When girls complain about being single…I tell them to just be plural.
Picture taken of me this morning….I have no shame…but this is why I’m single
I should point out, these are not real bangs…and forgive me it’s finals week!

Picture taken of me this morning….I have no shame…but this is why I’m single

I should point out, these are not real bangs…and forgive me it’s finals week!

04

May

Single Lady of the week…Liz Lemon!

Single Lady of the week…Liz Lemon!

03

May

A man without a woman is a bachelor. A woman without a man is a genius.

Issue of Food! It needs to be addressed!

So if you are anything like me your love for food is more than unhealthy. It’s not that I love to eat as much as it is I love food! It just taste so good. Doesn’t matter what kind of food it is

It could be pizza or a creative salad, an inventive ice cream sundae or a delicious fruit salad. I just love food! 

When addressing the issue of food and your current marital status there are a few tell tale signs as to reasons you might be single… for instance

You might be single if you say things like

If you are considering Orville Redenbacher as your only male companionship on a Saturday night we need to take a second look at your life! But hey, at least he won’t talk to you during the movie!

Next, I will address issues of midnight snackage. For me it’s a random mix of things I have in my pantry. Now, I have a nine year old sister and for financial reasons have been living with my parents this past year, so my pantry looks a whole lot different then it did when I was living on my own. I had no midnight snack opportunities when I was living on my own, now the choices are endless (if I was nine)!

If you really knew me you would know the series of activities that I partake in when I have had a particularly depressing day, or on those days when I realize I don’t control what’s happening in my life. For instance, this past Sunday a good friend of mine announced that he was moving to Arizona, thus I commenced the Depressed Erin Ritual. 

It usually starts with me walking into my house looking something like this…

…then I continue to my kitchen for that midnight snack.

It usually is some weird made up Trail Mix dish…

 

(Yes this is a mix of goldfish, cheerios, and Cheetos. No it’s not as good as I may try and make you believe.)

…and usually ends with me falling asleep while 500 Days of Summer lingers on my TV.

This is my go-to “I’m depressed,” movie. Every single girl should have one for those days that you just don’t think you can go on anymore.

With 500 Days of Summer, I don’t know, there is just something about Tom meeting Autumn at the end that gives me an overwhelming (and probably deceiving) sense of hope. Sadly I never make it through the end to see this part.

(ANYWAY!)

Moral of this story…If you have a specific food as a means to dealing with your control issues this may be a reason as to why you are single (or maybe it’s the fact that you have control issues).

Lastly, I would like to address the significance of amount of food a female eats in one sitting. I get it, it’s 2012 and women and men should be treated equal, but let’s face it, our stomachs probably shouldn’t be. 

If you can say this…..

…and you are not in a long term serious relationship, you are probably single. If you are in a new relationship and the man is ok with this, or thinks you are drop dead sexy because of it, HOLD ON TO HIM WITH ALL YOU GOT! That my friends is a keeper! Because when you have been dating him for 2 years he will be ok with the fact that you could have eaten 24!

Before I sign out there is one more food group I would like to address…….PIZZA! Yes, it does deserve a group all to itself because you can never have too much pizza!

If you are currently single, do yourself a favor order a large pepperoni pizza from Domino’s (must be Domino’s) and eat the whole damn thing by yourself. Let’s just put it this way… without a man… you don’t have to share!

Hope finals are going well for all you college students, and remember all you need is a love for food!

02

May

Introductions!

Hello My name is Erin and I am a 22 year old college student at the University of Louisiana in Lafayette majoring in Sociology. Regardless of what this may come off to look like I am not some crazy raged male hater, I do not own a single cat (although I prefer them to dogs) and I am not some lonely single woman wallowing in a big stinking heap of self pity! 

With this being said I would like to explain my reasoning and ideas behind this blog.

Simply this….Life can be funny as hell sometimes…You need to laugh at your self and it is healthy to have a good group of people who share this need to laugh at ones self.

Me and a select group of my friends have recently started a group text thread that we appropriately entitled “This Is Why I’m Single”

We simply send pictures or descriptions of what we are doing at a current moment in time and try to help each other smile at the fact that this is why you girls love me, but consequently this is why I do not have a significant other.

I really hope you as the reader can join in, relate, and share those moments when you realize, “hell, someone will eventually love me for this weird/gross/unattractive thing I do!”

Enjoy! and Let’s share some laughs!

Because it’s quite a sad moment when you realize that the trash goes out more than you do.
I’m pretty level headed I promise!

I’m pretty level headed I promise!